By Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin & Arthur E. Nowlin, LMSW, CAADC
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This article was written by Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin for Marriage.com
Do you find it difficult making a long-distance relationship work? Do you feel that a ‘successful long-distance relationship is a myth?
Well, you can keep a long-distance relationship going if you have the will to do it. Here’s a long-distance success story to motivate you to trust in your relationship and make it a success despite the distance.
The story of Andrew and Cindy
Andrew and Cindy were good friends through high school and remained friends in college. The couple had been dating for three years and realized that their friendship had developed into a romantic relationship.
They trusted one another because they had a past relationship of being good friends. The couple both enjoyed living in Detroit, Michigan, and were very accomplished in their careers.
Cindy got a lucrative job offer
Andrew was an investment broker, and Cindy was an attorney. They two wanted to marry and start a family.
One afternoon Cindy received a phone call from a prestigious law firm in Los Angeles, California. The firm was offering her a lucrative dream position as a senior corporate attorney.
Cindy had been very content at the firm where she was employed. However, she had high goals of advancing and working her way up the corporate ladder, without realizing the strain and pressure it would put on her relationship with Andrew.
Cindy was seriously considering accepting the position.
Breaking the news
Andrew, who was happy in the motor city and looking forward to married life with Cindy, had no thought or desire to relocate.
Cindy, knowing that she had to tell the news to Andrew, asked to meet with him that afternoon. Andrews agreed, and they met at a local restaurant.
After the meal, Cindy shared with Andrew the news about her job offer, and he was excited for her. Cindy added and said, “The job is located in Los Angeles, California.”
Andrew was speechless. The thought of Cindy leaving Detroit and having a long-distance relationship was not in his plan. Andrew asked her, “What about our relationship and marriage plans?”
Cindy replied, “We can still date from afar and then set a wedding date when I get established and settled in.” This was a dream come true opportunity for Cindy but a serious issue for Andrew. Cindy told Andrew that night that she was going to accept the offer.
The long-distance relationship
Man Dropping Women On The Train At The Railway Station Long-distance Relationship Concept
After a few months of their long-distance relationship had gone by. They would call each other every day, and they would take turns visiting one another twice a month.
Despite his feelings against leaving Detroit and having a long-distance relationship, he realized that his love for her was much more significant.
During their separation, there were times of stress, disappointment, and loneliness, even though they conversed daily by virtual connection and phone. Cindy loved her job, but she really missed being with Andrew the way she was accustomed.
Cindy often thanked Andrew for his love, sacrifice, and patience during their time apart.
She knew that this was not the way he wanted their relationship to mature. Cindy knew the only thing that could make this relationship work was real true love.
Finally, when they met…
Andrew was scheduled to arrive later that day for a visit, and they both were so excited.
They then took an afternoon walk, and Cindy said to Andrew, “The love that you have shown to me has convinced me that I am in love with you, and I want you in my life forever, and we can make this work.”
Andrew waited for a crowd to be nearby and asked for their attention and reached for Cindy’s hand and knelt down and proposed to her.
She cried and immediately accepted. The crowd cheered.
Long-distance relationships can work if true love is the main ingredient.
Moreover, a long-distance relationship entails a lot of positives that can benefit your relationship in the long run.
Some tools to help guide your long-distance relationships are commitment, faithfulness, honesty, regular communication, boundaries, paying attention, and addressing any red flags that may occur and sacrifice.
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This article was written by Dr. Kim Logan-Nowlin for Marriage.com
Love is a lot of things. It’s joy, excitement, pain, passion, fear…
Being in love gives you a roller coaster of all emotions. Love is happiness when you celebrate your beloved’s success; love is a sacrifice when you place your beloved’s needs above yours.
While falling in love might seem exciting, committing to it calls for efforts. Love and sacrifice go hand in hand. Unconditional love demands sacrifice for love, and surprisingly, you will be willingly making sacrifices for love if your feelings are genuine.
Below is a short story of Matthew’s sacrifice for love and how unconditionally he loves Terri.
A dreamy romance
Matthew and Terri had been married for nearly ten years. They met while attending the same local university, sharing several pre-med classes. The couple enjoyed working together on team assignments, and this developed into a friendship.
Matthew and Terri both were active and involved in community services and enjoyed helping the elderly. After completing their undergraduate studies, they were accepted into the same graduate school program to earn their Ph.D. in biochemistry.
The relationship between the two after six years flourished with love, faithfulness, happiness, and attraction for one another, and Matthew decided to ask for Terri’s hand in marriage. Terry was so surprised and excited, and when she composed herself, she accepted his proposal.
The couple both agreed first to finish their course studies, and after graduation, they would marry later that summer. Matthew and Terri had a large beautiful wedding and romantic honeymoon.
Problems start surfacing
Sad Couple Comforting Each Other
During the honeymoon, Terri began to experience some discomfort on her right side. It would last for a few minutes and subside. She did not mention her problem to Matthew because she thought it was a result of nerves and excitement. Nevertheless, the couple had a wonderful time in Hawaii and even looked forward to returning in the near future.
One afternoon at work, Terri had excruciating pain in her right side again and including a high fever. The discomfort was so painful that her supervisor called for a medical ambulance and notified her husband to meet her at the emergency room at the hospital.
After several tests, the doctors discovered that Terri was suffering from kidney failure and needed an emergency kidney transplant. The examiner stated that there were no matches available at the time for her surgery to occur, and she would have to be placed on an emergency waiting list.
While the doctors were explaining her situation, Matthew asked the doctors, “What about me! Can I be tested?” The doctors immediately arranged for Matthew to be tested, and they discovered that he was a perfect match for Terri.
A sacrifice like no other…
When Matthew went into Terri’s hospital room and told her that they found a match for her, Terri was so excited that she cried. Matthew then said, “It is me. I am a perfect match for you.” Terri was in total shock and so thankful for Matthew’s unconditional love.
He leaned over towards Terri and kissed her on the forehead and whispered, “You know I love you.” Terri’s eyes were full of joy and happiness. The time soon came for Matthew and Terri to be prepared for surgery, and they looked at each other, and both said, “See you soon.”
The procedure took about 4 hours, and there were no complications. Both Matthew and Terri were in recovery for a couple of hours and were adjusting well. Several hours had passed, and Matthew and Terri were put into the same hospital room after recovery.
Terri looked across the room and called out Matthew’s name, and he turned to her, and she said, “Thank you for loving me so much to help save my life.”
Matthew said, “I love you, and I will do anything for you. From day one, I have always loved you Terri, and this was an easy decision for me to make.”
Ninety days later, Matthew and Terri had a follow-up appointment scheduled to see if any complications might have occurred. After a brief examination, the doctor stated that they both were doing well. Matthew and Terri continued enjoying a loving, happy, romantic, and healthy marriage.
The couple recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary with family and friends. Every morning since the surgery, when Terri awakens, she says to Matthew, “I love you. You are my sacrifice of love.”
This real story shows that you will not hesitate to sacrifice for love when you have unconditional love for someone. Their problems become yours. You don’t run off, leaving them alone to deal with the tragedy. You stick around. And that is what unconditional love is.
Love means sacrifice. You get involved in all of your partner’s joys, trials, and tribulations. You become their rock, backup, shoulder to lean on. When you are loving someone unconditionally, you share laughter and breakdowns. You compromise and sacrifice for love. You are there with them through everything.
*The names have been changed to protect privacy.